la ta di da...and the arms of the ocean are carrying me.

ever come across a great band that has even better music? like when you find a song that you just want to blare so loud or where you want to put in headphones just so you can hear the music get even closer to your eardrums. i am TOTALLY loving the new Florence + the Machine album. holy smokes. if my neighbor wasnt home, it would be playing louder as i type, but i will be respectful [for now].

my favorite songs thus far:

• If Only For A Night
• Shake It Out
• Never Let Me Go [ultra love this]

"And the arms of the ocean are carrying me/And all this devotion was rushing out of me/ And the crashes are heaven for a sinner like me/But the arms of the ocean delivered me"

on another note, i am really bad at saving my pennies. i'm working on it though. one of the ways is by cooking more. seems simple but i am usually too busy [excuses are for the incompetent]. that being said, i can cook. i know how to and i am not that bad at it, at least that's what i think. so timmer came over on halloween and i made dinner. [we did nothing remotely halloween-ish]. i made something along these lines here. i thought they were pretty good. i added cilantro and some other spices. also cooked up some green beans with lime juice, onion and cilantro.

tonight i made this here. only i added crushed pepper into the sauce and added crab to the mixture. i am sure it would have been superb if it were real crab, but remember what i said, i am trying to save some pennies. imitation will have to do for the time being.

i also made my extra bedroom a little more inviting. i am sorting through gobs of paperwork and reorganizing my life. i am actually going to use my desk now that its cleared off! i have hung some of the African artwork on the walls and whatnot. its coming together nicely. my dad and i spent the day together [which was so great!] on saturday cutting down my loft and sanding it. then we put it together in my extra bedroom. i love it.

switching topics [stay with me now], i've been trying to dive deeper in doing things with my church. i attend regularly on sundays. mondays i serve our ESL program and on the leadership team. on wednesdays i attend a wonderful small group. all of which are great. but i need something more and i have been going in circles to figure out the missing piece. the sad thing is that i know/knew what it was all along - i just didnt want to admit it. but it was TOMA [top of mind awareness]. it's said all the time in churches. and for a long time i thought i was not one of those people. one of what people? huh? one of those people who does good deeds and does all the "right" things but misses the part thats most important... a relationship.

awe man. dang it.

so the thing that comes before saving pennies right now is strengthening my relationship with God. and its frustrating because i let it slack. it seems like my eyes are cloudy. i guess they always were. like i need a slap on the head and be told to wake up. i always feel about 2 steps behind. like i don't see God working until He's already worked it.

but i suppose our relationship with God is a continual thing. we grow, we slip, we fall, we get back up and we do it again and again. after all, that is how we learn and grow stronger and more dependable on God.

sunday, the pastor talked about pruning our relationship and our life. we snip off the things that are bad or not good for us in our life. most likely its things that we do on our own or things that feel good in our lives but we know are not good things- things that hold us back form knowing God. we snip it off, we trust God, and gall darn it! it hurts. its painful, its hard, we miss it and we want it back. lessons to learn though. God pulls us through if we depend on Him and obey.

I'll be doing some pruning and i dont think it will be fun but it'll be worth it.

and along the way, i will be loving this album :-] listen to it. thats my only request.

la ta di da...and the arms of the ocean are carrying me.